His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
