That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Randomize
