Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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