im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
