idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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