hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
