What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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