Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
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