this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
