I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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