I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
