ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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