i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
My legs feel like baby dolphins
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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