Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
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