I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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