Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I got inside last night via doggy door
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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