she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I forgot how hot balto sounded
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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