dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
