Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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