Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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