it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
