Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Randomize
