Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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