conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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