I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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