I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
