so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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