you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
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My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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