The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
