i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
