he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I could fuck to npr.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
