He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize