it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize