This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
