i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize
