She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
