If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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