nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?