Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?