It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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