You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
