Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize