Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.

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(517): Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months. http://tfl.nu/qynd

Replies (39) Good night (517) Bad night (9395) Order T-Shirt
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(718): View more from New York

Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.

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(718): Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't. http://tfl.nu/3gl0

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(828): View more from North Carolina

he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.

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(828): he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head. http://tfl.nu/re8d

Replies (24) Good night (1033) Bad night (3918) Order T-Shirt
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(972): View more from Texas

I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed

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(972): I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed http://tfl.nu/xlf6

Replies (8) Good night (3665) Bad night (927) Order T-Shirt
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(201): View more from New Jersey

at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was

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(201): at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was http://tfl.nu/89k6

Replies (21) Good night (3198) Bad night (1086) Order T-Shirt
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(701): View more from North Dakota

Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.

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(701): Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy. http://tfl.nu/k5h7

Replies (6) Good night (1143) Bad night (741) Order T-Shirt
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(361): View more from Texas

Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.

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(361): Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin. http://tfl.nu/3skp

Replies (2) Good night (1747) Bad night (952) Order T-Shirt
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.

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(610): You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel. http://tfl.nu/kyxg

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day

(617): View more from Massachusetts

How about a mike?

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Already had two of those

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(978): I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day (617): How about a mike? (978): Already had two of those http://tfl.nu/wf5g

Replies (4) Good night (1465) Bad night (541)
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(224): View more from Illinois

We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?

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(224): We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today? http://tfl.nu/c57g

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(845): View more from New York

My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...

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(845): My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's... http://tfl.nu/cszb

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(812): View more from Indiana

I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking

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(812): I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking http://tfl.nu/99b5

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(914): View more from New York

I had to warn the neighbors

(757): View more from Virginia

Warn them about what?! It's noon

(914): View more from New York

"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...

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(914): I had to warn the neighbors (757): Warn them about what?! It's noon (914): "Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess... http://tfl.nu/j7iv

Replies (4) Good night (628) Bad night (244)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT

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(931): ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT http://tfl.nu/g173

Replies (21) Good night (434) Bad night (222) Order T-Shirt
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(604): View more from British Columbia

I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.

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(604): I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself. http://tfl.nu/ea90

Replies (3) Good night (519) Bad night (259) Order T-Shirt

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