quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
