Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
