sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
