I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
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Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
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I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic