They should really pass out barf bags in church
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
