I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize