those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
This baby is an asshole
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
