I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
