i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
