Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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