PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
